Get 5000 friends on facebook
Any perceived violation of these terms could see you put in Facebook jail or your profile removed. There are a few people saying to just gather friends and turn it into a page and voila — you now have fans on an author page. Which, I suppose is one way to do it, but there are a few considerations to keep in mind before you jump on this idea. Youtube, Instagram, Twitter, blogs — all of it.
Learn How to Get 5000 Friend Request on Facebook
T here were no bells, just so you know. There were no alarms or whistles or charming notifiers, no clowns or sparklers or strippers, not even a measly congratulatory phone call from the zippycute billionaire tweeners who run Facebook Inc. There was no toaster oven.
No plaque. See, I have officially reached the ultimate threshold, the limit, the maximum allowable at this strange juncture in time. What a thing it is. Yes, I have officially achieved 5, friends on my personal Facebook account -- which is, for some reason, the limit of what Facebook allows on one's personal pages. This, then, is clearly a major milestone, some sort of glorious pinnacle achievement, if only because the limit implies that it is and only because someone over at Facebook HQ set the limit at 5, and no one anywhere seems to understand or have a clue as to exactly why.
No matter. I have 5, Facebook friends! I made it! What does it mean? What is the point? Is it fascinating and revelatory and does it tell us something curious about the zeitgeist, or is it useless digital sound and fury, signifying nothing? Is it both? I think it's both.
See, I started my FB account not all that long ago as a dirty little experiment, to play and explore and investigate the social networking phenom, deciding right off that I'd say "yes" to every single friend request, to anyone and everyone interested and kind enough to friend me, somehow trusting that it wouldn't go awry or invite in all kinds of dark, dank, funky energy or open me up to all sorts of bizarre input or attacks or offers of who knows what.
Booty calls. Marriage proposals. Peet's gift cards. Not all bad, obviously. I had no idea what to expect, really, or even if anyone would care -- or, more importantly, if I'd care, if I'd hook into it in some constructive way, or if I'd simply open an account and play with it for a month and then, like millions of Web 2. For the record: By way of some odd miracle, I've only had to block two people to date: one an insane stalker-ish type who posted psychotic Christian screeds on my wall, and the other an old high school acquaintance who never evolved beyond simpleminded homophobic jackass.
Not bad, considering. I wanted I don't know exactly what. To see how far I could go? To gather fans and friends and like-minded perverts into a hot, cultish cluster of shared love and laughter and random vibe? To stroke my own ego and go giddy with unknown faces and unusual names and peer into the lives of myriad strangers and have them peer right back, see if any of it added any value whatsoever to my world? Damn right. But something unexpected happened on the way to the faddish digital spectacle.
My Facebook page evolved into a valuable, useful, nicely addictive, fascinating creature, an alive and dynamic thing offering all sorts of unexpected delights: histories, memories, karmic dangers, weirdness, casual curiosities, new friendships, old groanings. Which, come to think of it, was really what I was after in the first place. Well, mostly. Which is to say: active, responsive, reasonably or even wildly intelligent, at least somewhat authentic, intimate, human.
On Facebook, no one can hide behind fake names and rancid anonymous ideologies and sneering spittle-flecked right-wing Bill O'Reilly bulls--t, and if they try it, not only can you see who they are and just how sad and low their lives hang to make them behave that way, but FB makes it a snap to kick them to the digital curb, forevermore.
But it's not just that. I keep track of old friends I never imagined I'd find or hear from again. I keep track of yoga students and fellow yoga teachers and their schedules, of circles of friends with their own peculiar swirls and trajectories, of various marriages, breakups, announcements, writers and their works-in-progress, ex-girlfriends and so on.
And of course, if they so desire, they can all keep track of me. Facebook offers its own creative pleasures. Hell, I've messed with the verbiage of my status updates to such a degree that a beautiful writer friend even wrote a piece about them , the wonderful replies they receive and the found poetry it all offers up, en total.
I mean, how meta can you get? But now it's all over. The experiment has reached its threshold. Unless I start un-friending hundreds of people, I can invite no one else in.
The current gang is astonishing indeed, but it's better when it's moving and growing and writhing. Something's just not right about the 5K limit, particularly when the whole point of social networking is, presumably, to see just how social you can get. I do have options. Facebook, of course, offers unlimited fan pages, which behave similar to the personal pages except they're wide open to the world -- no private friend requests, no easy groupings, far less dynamic interaction, etc.
The chasm is made wider. The connection is mutated. Is there something better? Can I go elsewhere? I have a lively Twitter feed , but the intimacy level is irrelevant and true interaction almost nil. I have a personal home page and a yoga site for my teaching, though neither is designed for cool interaction. I have a hot but very sporadic and unpredictable personal newsletter I invite you to join right now , but that's not exactly community, or dialogue.
I have a wild blog in the works, but I don't anticipate many offers of marriage and designer clothing and oral sex from it.
Or do I? So for now, I can only do what I can do. Here, then, is my new Facebook fan page. I don't like the sound of it. I'm not sure I like the modes of communication it offers. But it's not bad. After all, I wasn't too sure of Facebook itself, in the beginning. Maybe this will be the coolest thing since the Jackhammer Jesus. Will you join? Can we chat and hang and peer into each other's worlds respectfully, happily, unexpectedly, half naked and warmly buzzed and ever in awe of the mad swirl around us?
Why the hell not? The experiment continues. Join Mark on Facebook and Twitter , or email him. His website is markmorford. For his yoga classes, workshops and retreats, click markmorfordyoga. To join the notification list for this column, click here and remove one article of clothing.
To get on Mark's personal mailing list, click here and remove three more. This column also has an RSS feed and a very handy archive page. Back-to-school could be delayed by CA budget cuts. Most Popular. Here's what to expect at airports and on planes. South Bay city is finally getting a Trader Joe's. VICE Media announces massive layoffs; union bites back. Winter-like storm takes aim at Bay Area.
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The Pros and Cons of 5000 Friends
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How to quickly add 5000 friends on Facebook