How to get a nerdy guy to ask you out
When I ask my friends about it, they say that all geek guys do this—they can never tell when a woman is flirting with them. Or does this just sound like a matter of him not being into me? This is partially confirmed when I talk to geek girls about it; what I generally hear from them is that A boys have no idea when girls are actually flirting with them, almost as much as B they take friendly gestures as sexual advances. According to a study recently conducted by Indiana University , men on average scored much lower than women when detecting social cues. They showed the men images of women being friendly, seductive, sad, or rejecting. Men mixed up seductive and friendly a whole bunch, apparently.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: EP 26: Build-A-Boy and Rewrites
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The 12 Sexiest Things About Nerdy Guys
Written by David Darling. They were just a little bit "off", fair game for exclusion and mockery. By the 80's the nerd was becoming more defined, but no less disdained: socially inept possibly arrogant and caustic rather than shy utterly uninterested in mainstream pursuits fashion, girls, sports obsessed by their own mysterious passions comics, technology, theatre. The rise of tech billionaires, and TBBT, have brought nerd guys to the brink of coolness.
They're not all happy about their new status, and the swelling ranks of geek-wannabes. If you're dating a true nerd quiz , he's likely to contemptuously dismiss fake-nerds. My wife thinks I'm a geek. Rather than the stereotype above, I prefer to think of my fellow geeks as people who are intensely alive , open-minded, unconventional and authentic.
And apparently we're good in the sack too! So, how do you handle a relationship with a nerdy guy? Use these comments as a place to start but, as always, you'll need to work it out for yourself. Make an effort to really know the person rather than the label. Nerds are far more alike the "average guy" than they are different.
So don't forget everything you've learned about men. And what do all guys need? Not just respect for their nerdy skills either. Often they know they are masters in their field, and are deservedly self-confident. It's like a man telling a stunning woman how beautiful she is. Sure, always good to hear, but she knows this. Now, genuinely praise her for some other ability, and she's listening hard!
As his partner, your job is to be his number one cheerleader. Heavy-handed teasing will drive him back into his shell.
This is not to say you can't challenge him. There's nothing nerds enjoy more than a reasoned discussion. A defining characteristic of nerds is being both passionate and expert on an unusual subject. If you feel the need to mock him for spending Friday night researching Runescape lore, then you should ask yourself why exactly are you dating him. And as for trying to cure him of his nerdiness in a "me or the Ninjago" ultimatum, know that the Lego will win.
Don't worry, you don't need to be girl-nerd, whispering kinky Klingon in his ear. In fact, Dr Nerdlove thinks nerds are better off dating mainstream girls rather than their fantasy Geek Girl. But it won't harm to show some appreciation for his heroes. Ask him some questions, and at least try to understand why he thinks Dick, Asimov, Gaiman and Adams are the greatest writers ever.
Try also to keep up with the latest news of his favorite books, movies or games. Wouldn't you rather he discussed it first with you, rather than his on-line community?
He might be inclined to vent about minutia, obsess over arcane details that the rest of us neither understand nor care about.
Be kind. Listen for 10 minutes before steering the conversation away. Nerds are happy talking to anyone about their passion. But if that someone is a sexy girl then they've just arrived in nerd heaven! He will never forgive you if his friends label you fake geek girl. Most guys, nerdy or not, consider their friends to be an extension of themselves. Any perceived rejection of his friends will be taken personally.
Understand and accept their unique tastes, take some interest in what they love doing and genuinely share in their passions and concerns. He will understand you not spending every weekend together with his friends; what will hurt your relationship is if you blow-off his buddies as a bunch of boring nerds.
More than most men, nerds don't respond to subtle hints. Often they genuinely don't read your body language. Or they do get the signal, but lack the confidence to follow through.
But physically drag him away from Github and he'll soon forget about debugging his code, and prove to you that nerds really do make the best lovers. For a relationship of any kind to work, you have to find a common ground; a hobby, interest or activity that allows you to spend quality time together. There are plenty of things that both of you will love. Hopefully you read? Even if your tastes in literature don't greatly overlap, he will love to hear your thoughts on your current novel.
Show him your nerdy side the one you hide from your girl-friends. He respects passion, intelligence and excellence in any field. Try him out with some activity that gets you fired up. You might be surprised how interested he becomes in the finer aspects of choux pastry making! In their passion for fact and truth, nerdy men can run right over other people's emotions. Annoyingly, you can't treat their own feelings the same way they treat yours.
One thing common with nerdy guys is that they disregard or even mistrust feelings. Even more than other types of men, they will keep their emotions closed up. If he does open up to you, it means that he really values your friendship and is ready to get more serious with the relationship. The worst mistake you can do at this point is to ignore or laugh off his feelings. You will have killed any chance of forming a strong emotional connection with him. On the same note, do not be frustrated if he takes a while to open up to you.
It will take time, support and understanding. Most nerds will be really good in a single area such as movies, physics, astronomy or tech. With this time-consuming focus comes the corresponding ignorance of many other topics that a "normal" person would be good at, such as pop culture, politics and social manners. This may sound surprising but you may have to do a lot of explaining and teaching when you are together.
Do not get frustrated or laugh off his ignorance on these subjects. Instead, take it as a growth opportunity. You learn about his main interest and he learns about a multitude of other topics.
There will come a time when he will be as good as you at some of these things. For now, be the gentle loving explainer. Dating a nerd is just like dating any other guy in that conflict is bound to arise. You have to be ready to handle these conflicts in the right way.
Remember that nerds tend to be more logical than emotional. There's an overlap with nerdism and autism spectrum. Getting overly emotional or dramatic during an argument will not help matters. The biggest problem with nerd stereotypes is that they cast nerdy guys as some sort of aliens, who have weird habits and tastes. But a geek is not much different from any other guy; they just have different strengths and weaknesses.
The same rules that apply in a non-nerdy relationship - respect, understanding, love - will also apply in a nerdy one. And if you are worried your guy jock, geek, hipster, whatever is losing interest, check out my free ebook: Why Men Lose Interest.
Also in Intimate Relationships With Men :. Image credit.
10 Ways to Flirt with a Nerd
Nerds are still human beings. They develop crushes and fall in love. And over the past decade, they have become the new brand of sexy.
Bobby Cinema has written seven detective stories in one book about each different character going through solving a difficult case, being in the action and deal with real intensive stuff they had to go through from solving cases. For these seven ordinary detectives and their team, their work usually ends up in a library, which is their sanctuary and a place to read and relax at the same time. The first detective series is called Raymond: Librarian PI. Ray Levenstein, a former FBI agent, took over the head librarian job from his friend Jerry who helped him get in the LAPD police academy and became his mentor when he grew up. He was forced into retirement when he was shot in the line of fire when he was a FBI agent.
How to Flirt With a Nerdy Guy
Fortunately, you have Dr. NerdLove to guide you. Geeks spend a lot of time lost in their own heads, which allows for the development of a rich imagination and a shocking level of creativity. A geek boyfriend will surprise you with his imaginative gifts and out-of-the-ordinary dates and experiences. Geeks are very cerebral creatures. Geeks take interest in a wide variety of subjects and pride themselves in being engaged in the world around them. Still waters run deep. You will never find someone as excited about his hobbies or interests as a geek and his eagerness to share them.
4 Smart Rules For Dating A Nerd
He's cute, funny What's not to love? So, you've met a great guy, but after a few dates you begin to realize he's not like the other guys you've been dating. He's smart, a little shy, quirky, and he loves science fiction, online gaming, comic books, or other related pursuits. In other words, he's a nerd.
You will never want to stop cuddling with him ever. Nerdy guys are super affectionate and therefore, superior cuddlers by a mile. Eventually one of you will get hungry due to your marathon cuddling, but you will not want him to get up to get you food because the cuddling will stop and that will be the worst.
How to Date a Nerdy Guy
Lucy Kevin. Oak Press, LLC , More than pages!
What a full weekend I had. There were boys everywhere. After an exceptionally fun evening of speed-dating with the nerds , I decided to get in touch with the man who organized and MC-ed the whole event, one Matt Wasowski , a. Anyway, I asked Matt if he had any special advice about how to flirt with the nerds Here's how our conversation went. What's your definition of a nerd?
How to Get a Nerd to Like You & Win Over the Intellectual Badass
The stereotypical nerdy guy is often viewed as less physical and more cerebral than other guys. Nerdy guys are often perceived as less cool and not as likely to attract flirtation from women. But this isn't always the case. Some women are attracted to this type of guy. Because nerdy guys may not expect to be flirted with, you may need to apply more obvious tactics to get a nerdy guy to take the hint. Approach a nerdy guy directly. Some nerdy guys may be unaccustomed to having women flirt with them, so it may take a direct comment to get the message across.